The Beginning
The moment she spotted me, I knew it. Granted, she did a really good job of pretending she couldn't see me. The fact she halted in her steps the moment her eyes met mine, then quickly darted past me as she hurried into the school, gave her away. Students walked past me all morning without seeing me but this one saw me. I stood up from the wooden picnic table, where I'd been sitting awaiting her arrival. I could force her to acknowledge me by becoming visible to everyone else but I wasn’t in the mood to do so just yet. The determination in her eyes intrigued me. If there hadn’t been a parking lot full of witnesses, I have the feeling she would have yelled at me instead of cowering like most humans. The monotony of my existence didn't hold much promise of entertainment. I’d play her games for awhile. Games were fun to play and it'd been much too long since I’d come across a worthy opponent, especially a female one...
Death Beaks the Rules
This was it. Fate had played out just as planned and the idiot kid she was interested in would be the reason she left today. For the first time in my existence, this felt wrong. The pull to be there. The pull to take her soul. It wasn’t stronger than my need to keep her alive.
I stood watching her talk to her silly friend. Pagan wasn’t hearing a word her friend was saying. Instead, her eyes were scanning the hallway for the boy. Watching this was more than I could handle right now. I had a fight on my hands and this was the last thing I needed to witness. I decided to wait outside. Maybe it would be easier than I thought to change the course of fate.
As if right on cue, Pagan emerged from the building with tears glistening in her eyes. This was becoming a freaking runaway train I couldn’t stop. Dammit! I had to do something. Change things somehow.
“Don’t leave. He isn’t worth it.” I heard the pleading in my voice as I fell into step beside her.
“I don’t want to stay. I’m angry and I just want to leave.” Of course she did. That was the grand plan. I had to stop her.
“Please, Pagan, don’t get in your car. Go back inside. Forget the stupid kid and enjoy the rest of your day. Don’t let something that idiot did send you running.”
She stopped walking and hope soared inside my chest. It was an odd feeling. It was... an emotion. I was experiencing an emotion. A strong one.
“Why do you care if I leave? Are you the new hall monitor and I missed the memo?”
This was it. I could change things. I could keep her alive.
“I’m begging you to go back in the school.”
“Why?”
A growl of frustration erupted from my chest. She was so stubborn. “Do you have to question everything? Can’t you just listen for once?”
Annoyance took the place of hurt in her eyes and her posture snapped to attention, “I’m leaving here. You can’t stop me. I don’t have to listen to you. If you don’t have a good excuse then there is no reason for me to stay.”
She spun around and headed to her car. I’d tried. Nothing short of physically holding her here would keep her from getting in that blasted car and leaving. The pull was still there. Pagan’s life was still marked. Nothing I’d done had changed anything. I’d only slowed it down.
I was going to have to break the rules. What the penalty was I wasn’t sure but I wouldn’t be able to continue on if I had to take Pagan’s soul. She was young. There was so much she hadn’t experienced yet. And... I was selfish. I wasn’t ready to let her go.
I watched as her car spun out of the parking lot before joining her in order to completely change her soul’s fate.
I sat anxiously watching her wondering at what moment the accident would happen. How it would happen. She couldn’t see me sitting in the passenger’s seat beside her. I’d made sure of that. If I was going to completely alter fate, I at least needed to keep some things hidden from her.
She wasn’t going to stop. The stop sign loomed up ahead but Pagan was looking in her mirror. This was it.
“Pagan please look at the road,” I begged even though I knew she couldn’t hear me. The large truck wasn’t slowing down either.
“THE ROAD,” I roared again wishing I could just make myself visible or at the least speak to her soul but I’d only make matters worse if I did. So instead, I did the only thing I could do, I grabbed the steering wheel and kept the car from rolling down the side of the embankment. I didn’t want her body damaged.
The truck’s horn blared and the impact wasn’t directly on Pagan’s side. I made sure of that. It hit the front pushing the steering wheel towards her chest. Quickly, I unbuckled her seatbelt and lifted her gently from the car.
Gasping for air loudly as I held her, I realized she’d been unable to breathe. Damn I hated this. I wanted to rush her to the hospital myself keeping her safe in my arms. But I couldn’t. I’d already done too much. I laid her gently on the ground and held her hand whispering promises I knew I could keep while I waited on the ambulance. She didn’t move. Her eyes didn’t even flutter but she was breathing. Her heart was beating. I wasn’t taking this soul today. A panicked murmur escaped her lips and I bent down to sing in her ear. I didn’t stop when I heard the sirens. I didn’t stop when they began working over her body. I didn’t stop until they lifted her and placed her securely in the ambulance.
The Bedroom Scene
“I hate the color red almost as much as I hate blond hair.”
My need to reassure her was going to completely botch my plan to push her away. But watching her pout over my going to this stupid dance with Kendra was difficult. I didn’t like to be the reason she was unhappy. Couldn’t she see this was what was best for her? The frown on her face and range of emotions flashing in her eyes told me she didn’t believe me. As much as I needed to put distance between us, I couldn’t leave her like this.
Standing, I closed the distance between us. Just this once I’d forget why touching Pagan was wrong. As my chest brushed against her back, her small body shivered. Closing my eyes I bit back a curse. I wouldn’t be able to stop myself now. This was a form of control I’d never had to exercise. I wasn’t sure I even knew how. Wrapping my arms around her, I pressed her back firmly against my chest. Pleasure coursed through me and I tightened my hold. The fear that I’d never be able to release her now I’d held her, seeped into my thoughts.
“She means nothing to me.”
Her body trembled and my need to own her became unbearable.
“I would never lie to you, Pagan,” I whispered against her ear. She tilted her head back to stare up at me. Lowering my head I kissed the soft skin on the top of her ear. The smell of her skin was delicious. Unlike anything I’d ever experienced. I continued kissing the delicate skin along her face. Inhaling the intoxicating aroma it presented. My hands found her hips and I worried the fierce grip I had on her might bruise her. But I couldn’t force myself to relax my demanding hold.
“You tempt me. I can’t be tempted. I’m not made to be tempted but you, Pagan Moore, you tempt me. From the moment I came for you I was drawn in. Everything about you...” I needed to touch more of her. I ran a hand along the exposed skin on her arm. It heated under my touch. “You make me crazy with need. With want. I didn’t understand it at first. But now I know. It’s your soul calling to me. Souls mean nothing to me. They aren’t supposed to. But yours has become my obsession.” Instead of cowering away from me in fear, like a normal human would when Death was admitting to being obsessed with them, Pagan leaned against me full of trust. Her neck exposed as her head fell back on my shoulder. That skin would be warm and delicate. I lowered my head and kissed the gentle curve there. Enjoying the excitement of her racing pulse beneath my lips.
“I want to kill that boy every time I see his hands on you.” I trailed kisses up her neck as she shifted closer to me full of expectation. “I want to rip his arms from his body so he can’t touch you again.” Unable to hold back the growl inside of me caused by the possessive emotion that only Pagan had ever managed bring out of Death. This was wrong. I couldn't own her. I couldn’t have her. I was Death. She was human. I couldn’t claim her soul for myself. Agony ripped through me.
“But I can’t have you, Pagan. You’re not meant for me.” I whispered harshly. Wanting more than anything to change this. I needed to leave her. This was only going to hurt her more in the end. Picking her up, I cradled her against me for only a moment. Filing away the memory of how she felt wrapped up in my arms, then I laid her on the bed and quickly stood up. I couldn’t continue to touch her.
“Please,” she whispered.
I couldn’t witness the pleading etched on her face. Closing my eyes tightly I wanted to explain it all. Make her understand. But I couldn’t. The less she knew. The safer she was. So instead, I told her the only thing I could, “I can’t, Pagan. It would destroy us both.” Without opening my eyes to see her one last time, I vanished.
Source:
Abbi Glines
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